I think all you can do is make the most of the time you have with people, as long as you care about them in the moment then count them as a friend. Around the time I first started trying to figure this stuff out I was an avid reader of the web comic Queen of Wands. I think I developed some of views and attitudes based on the final strip. http://www.queenofwands.net/

As we can love each other (on a spiritual level), we are able to even disagree fiercely (on an intellectual level) without feeling any separation or withdraw of affection and friendship.

So many deeply impacting things have happened in our lives so far and that makes life rich and meaningful, while generating more questions; questions that will one day be answered one way or another I guess… The one thing I know is that it doesn’t so match matter why, but how, and then we can move to forgiveness and release.

Life is about bringing and discussing new questions. Bring it on! Keep asking, keep learning! How exciting!

Since I have talked to you my good friend Neil (28 yrs) broke his back in two places and currently can’t walk. This comes just a few years after a 10 story lift drop, then a 2 storey one two weeks later, a surgeon that left gauze inside him during an operation that rendered him unable to have kids followed a long bout of chronic fatigue. This is a guy who understand adversity.

Needless to say he was one angry dude toward God and that spawned a 3 hour conversation. 1 hour of anger, 2 hours of feeling happy and loved by God.. it was a process, but Neil was able to reconnect with God and feel at peace and feel ‘safe’ and loved (huh? with a broken back… only God could be credited for that!)

I’m still not decided whether we change God’s mind, or God allows circumstance to change based on the desires of our prayers, what I do know is that God does not change. (heck it even says that somewhere in the Bible!) Until I find out the answer to that question, I’ll be happy wrestling with this one.

Heck, during church services (and conferences) I’ve seen miraculous healing of people I know, but then no healing of the person next to me? (and vice versa). While I believe in the tangible profit of prophesy and healing, I see it being manipulated also (as we are of course… human! and everyone gets things back the front sometimes). Fittingly, we do get carried away with signs and wonders (hence the name), and, if not used with clear and simple teaching and understanding, this can lead to confusion and fear. These things are good, but are they at the core of being a Christian, well no, but they are tools (like all gifts) to focus people on God (if we don’t get in the way).

Hey Waz, perhaps rather than you faith being ‘thin’, rather you faith has been stripped back to it’s simplicity, something that Jesus wants for us all! How awesome! Onward to the questions!

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Don’t worry Linda, you’re by no means unique in your view and there’s plenty of great thinkers around the church (and joining the church), and there’s a big shift in the church worldwide (from what I read) to move more to faith-led Christianity, and away from ‘strict’ rule-based ‘boxed-in theology’ back to the true nature of faith and the understanding of the application of works.

Just this year the Australian Pentecostal church grew 27% – this says volumes about what people want from the organisations that make up the church, and it says lots of things are being done right.

And the other thing I admire (I think I said this about you and Tan as a couple when Jessica was born) – your honesty in talking about the way life REALLY is, and your constant strength and determination in working towards a healthy way of dealing with everything that gets thrown at you.

Thanks for sharing, hope it provided some form of catharsis, or metacognition, or some other fancy word that I want to mean that articulating and sharing your thoughts helped you work through them some more. Lots of love, Dee xxx

I have been reconstructing my beliefs from the foundation up because most of what I have been taught isn’t really God, but what people have wrongly interpreted as God… It has amazed me just how much junk people forced in there in the name of God! People might worry that I am losing ‘my faith’ but in actual fact I am finally seeing the real light and life has never looked brighter!

I now choose not to look at life as a mission, a race, or a list of must dos to get to heaven or be right with God… I choose to just live, and it is in the just being myself and choosing my own adventure that the things in my heart and mind are only just now finally coming finally starting to happen – because I don’t care who or what any more.

Does a beautiful bird with it’s melodious song strive to be so glorious and make us see how awesome God is? No – it just lives it’s life without worry and, well…

I am now certain God doesn’t want anything more from us than us just following our heart… And with him being a part of our heart, we can’t help but follow our destiny.